Dear everyone that calls me at work,
This is to serve as a final notice, any further inquiry into the topic will result in immediate termination of our conversation and/or angry verbal abuse. I am a mid-level analyst. I'm not the executive of my department. I'm certainly not in charge of someone else's department. I cannot correct everyone else's work. I will not listen to your complaints to the effect that you simply do not want to follow our processes.
I can help you resolve issues or direct you to the person that can. I can break your problem down into manageable pieces and work with you to fix them. I can also tell you to stop complaining.
Oh, and PS, you should always remember that your point of contact in this company is me, a bitchy queen that does not enjoy mornings and certainly does not enjoy hillbillies speculating on what I should do. Communication Rule #1: always remember your audience.
TY, LYLAS,
-Dickie
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