Dear Chicago Weather

Dear Chicago Weather,

How's it going? Um, so listen… I'm not really sure how to say this, but you really, really stink. I mean, all Summer long you give us bland and mild 80 degree weather, if that. Then, just as if you got bored with that idea, you turned on us and gave us 50-60 degree weather for the start of Fall. It's total BS!

I've lived all other this country, and even outside it. I've seen how seasons are suppose to be. And after living here for three years, I can clearly see that you don't have a flipping clue what each season is suppose to be like. You either snow at the beginning of Fall, or give us 6 months straight of snow as if we're in Alaska, or you give us an excellent Spring yet somehow forget to transition to Summer, but you haven't gotten it right yet.

So here's the deal. You need to get your shit together. I mean, we all love you and are here to support you, but there comes a time where we have to say you either get on board or get the hell on… and we're not really seeing you get on board. Maybe it's all the alcohol, or maybe just the stress, but whatever it is you're way too distracted to carry on. So, I'm going to give you one more chance to get your act together. I love you, but if you keep this up I'm going to have to move on.

LYLAS,

Dickie

Solis To DoL: I'm Proud Of Pride

A friend passed this along to me, and I felt it only prudent to share this with everyone. Given the current atmosphere surrounding President Obama's Administration and his lack of movement on promises he made to our community, this letter by current Secretary of Labor Hilda Solis to Department of Labor employees shows that this administration is still very much more gay forward than any other before it.

As a little back story, the DoL has posters in its offices proclaiming Pride month, following suit with President Obama's proclamation earlier this month of National Gay and Lesbian Pride month. Some employees saw fit to desecrate those posters. This is the response of Secretary Solis, in a letter titled "I'm Proud Of Pride":

Dear Colleagues:

On June 1st, I initiated an elevator poster campaign in the Frances Perkins Building, with the goal of recognizing department initiatives and accomplishments, and to share my thoughts and priorities with the entire DOL team. We are currently exploring ways to provide the same information to BLS and to our regional offices.

Something else far more important also happened on June 1st. The President issued a proclamation recognizing June as national Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender (LGBT) Pride Month. I was excited to have an opportunity, through our poster campaign, to acknowledge and celebrate the contributions of the LGBT community and affirm our commitment to all workers across the country. The posters went up in the elevators on Monday.

As a founding member of the LGBT Caucus in the U.S. House of Representatives, I was particularly pleased to have the opportunity to be the first Secretary in the department’s history to publicly recognize Pride Month. I am very proud of that.
It appears, however, that some members of the Labor Department team have a different view, as it has come to my attention that most of the posters have been continually defaced or removed. On several occasions, even the poster frames have been torn completely off the elevator walls.

My reaction to this news has ranged from disappointment to outrage.

I do not believe these actions represent the majority of our employees, so I refuse to let this situation define us. But I do want to make myself absolutely clear: Respect for others is non-negotiable at the U.S. Department of Labor.

As the enforcer of fair and safe workplaces across the country, each and every one of us must be committed to working with all employers and employees, no matter their race, color, religion or sexual orientation. And as colleagues, each and every one of us must embrace, value, and celebrate the contributions of the entire Labor Department family.

The posters will stay up until the end of the month, and will be replaced immediately if they are removed or destroyed. This is a small way to remind everyone here how I, and most of our colleagues, feel about this issue.

We will continue to recognize and celebrate diversity at the U.S. Department of Labor, through the posters in the elevators, as well as education initiatives, special observances and events. I would very much like to hear your suggestions and thoughts on how we do this, as well as how we constructively address this specific issue at the department.

As always, I appreciate your efforts on behalf of working people across the country. And I wish each and every one of you a very happy Pride Month.

Hilda L. Solis
U.S. Secretary of Labor

I love this letter for many reasons, not the least of which being that she is stating "They're here, they're queer, get used to it" in a slightly different way. Going into Pride weekend in most of the major cities in the country, and with the 40th anniversary of the Stonewall Riots just around the corner, I think this is an appropriate little something for us LGBT's to nibble on.

This Week's Letter To Obama

Dear President Obama,

Over the weekend, Defense Secretary Robert Gates announced to the country that the administration has decided that the repeal of the aged, dated, useless, and anti-military Don't Ask, Don't Tell policy will be put on the back burner, or more accurately "pushed down the road." As I'm sure you are quite aware, DADT has been responsible for the termination of several thousands of military careers. When considering how many of those careers were interpreters in highly needed areas or intelligence analysts, it would also be fair to assume that these terminations have caused a few causualties as well. Casualties that could possibly been prevented if our country would simply choose to not enshrine anti-gay sentiment into law.

Kicking the repeal of DADT down the road will only result in a less prepared and less effective military. It's not even a matter of fairness at this point, it's a matter of making sure our best military personnel are being used in both wars that we are currently involved in. We, as a country, simply cannot afford to sit back and allow qualified soldiers to be sent home day after day if we expect to win these fights!

I'm asking you to reconsider this generic, non-conclusive "down the road" timeline for fulfilling your campaign promise or repealing Don't Ask, Don't Tell. It's time for the Lesbian and Gay population of this country to serve in the military without the constant fear of being "found out," and without being made to feel ashamed of who they are. Every man and woman that serves bravely in our military deserves to be treated like a hero for their service, but as of right now many of them are made to feel unwelcomed. This cannot continue to happen. Please, be the Change you promised America and actually fulfill your promise to repeal Don't Ask, Don't Tell.

Sincerely,

Dickie

One Queen's Letter To Those That Would Disturb Him At Work

Dear everyone that calls me at work,

This is to serve as a final notice, any further inquiry into the topic will result in immediate termination of our conversation and/or angry verbal abuse. I am a mid-level analyst. I'm not the executive of my department. I'm certainly not in charge of someone else's department. I cannot correct everyone else's work. I will not listen to your complaints to the effect that you simply do not want to follow our processes.

I can help you resolve issues or direct you to the person that can. I can break your problem down into manageable pieces and work with you to fix them. I can also tell you to stop complaining.

Oh, and PS, you should always remember that your point of contact in this company is me, a bitchy queen that does not enjoy mornings and certainly does not enjoy hillbillies speculating on what I should do. Communication Rule #1: always remember your audience.

TY, LYLAS,

-Dickie

Dear Mr. Obama

Hi there!

Listen, I know I'm just some dude from Chicago, but I'd really appreciate a minute of your time.  I've got a few things I'd like to talk to you about.

First, I know you're a smart guy.  Really smart actually.  So I'm hoping your already in front of this, but do me a favor and appoint your own cabinet.  I mean, make it your own.  We liked Clinton, for the most part, but please don't reappoint his entire staff.  You won't get anywhere, and definitely won't achieve that goal of Change, if you simply re-hash the past.  I'm not saying don't bring along some of the good ones, but please make this your cabinet, not Clinton 2.0.

Second, I need you to jump on this gay civil rights movement.  Like yesterday.  I've ready your platform, and I have to say that I'm floored and excited by it.  I'm also realistic.  We're not getting all of those things.  It's just reality.  We deserve it all and more, and we'll keep fighting for it all, but I'm pretty sure you alone can't make that happen.  And I'm a bit jaded by the last Democratic administration who, just as soon as they had promised us the world, turned around and tossed us right under the bus as soon as they had the chance.  So, please, if you're going to do it, do it, but don't promise anything you don't plan on acting on.

In summation, we've all placed a lot of hope in you, so if you could try to achieve that and not play safe, we'd really, really like it.  All of us, particularly in the Gay Community, have really felt personally attacked over the past 8 years, and we feel even more so given the results of this last election.  Please, help us rectify this situation.

Thanks and in peace and love,

dickie

PS - Why haven't you said a word about the protests going on across the country?  Just curious, because we'd all love to hear what you have to say.

Open Letter To Crazy Christians

Dear Crazy Christians,

I'm over it. Completely and totally over it. There was a time when I was sympathetic to the cause of family values and freedom from over-zealous legislators. But that time has passed, washed away faster than it came. And let me tell you why:

You are bat shit insane. Completely. Not all of you, but that rabid Conservative Machine that governs you actions and thoughts, you know, the one that acts like the Catholic Church of old with your various Cardinals and Popes (Dobson, All the twits on 700 Club, etc.). Yep, those ones. You mean to tell me that it is within your jurisdiction to hate? At all? Ever? Really? I'm probably not the first person to point this out, and sure I won't be the last, but your message of intolerance and bigotry is... well, kinda ridiculous and hypocritical.

I know, I've kinda been one to focus on details instead of the bigger picture many times. I'm guilty of that too. But, in reality, the bigger picture of love and peaceful coexistence is pretty much exactly the point you're missing. Love for all and everyone. But there's that little quote there in this book you hold tight to all the time, isn't there? A few of them? Cool, cool, I get it, but there's plenty more, in that same book, that explain why just about everything you do is ass-backwards.

I for one am tired of your bigotry and fevered hatred. I'm over it. You really need to stop hating and fighting, because, let's be honest, the only reason you fight gay rights is because it's a pissing match for you. Here in the states, the minority are protected from the tyranny of the majority by things like a court system. What's really ironic about that is that idea was originally instated to protect the churches from the tyranny of those of us who think you are bat shit insane and would prefer to never see your organizations around again. How quickly the tables turn though. Once you taste power, you go for the fucking throat as if you have a "moral majority" and can affect change.

Well, too fucking bad. Us Gays are going to keep fighting, and we're going to win. Because we're absolutely in the right, and you are obviously insane. So, for your own sake, I'd back the fuck off the gay rights and marriage issues, because in the end you'll lose, not just the fight but money and supporters. As people see you for what you really are, bigoted ass hats hiding behind a pretense of religious vigor, they'll flock. They already are, but it's going to get worse. I'm not hating, I am judging, but in the end, I'm just Gaying...


(Please, feel free to leave your thoughts and additions in the comments)