Fuck Hate: Love Me Some Catharsis

Tearing Down The Argument

I need you all to take a few minutes or so and go read this piece over at Bilerico. I love Bilerico, and this piece is a fine example of why I love the site. Poster Josh Olsen tears apart the most common rhetoric from the conservative, mostly Christian Right concering marriage equality. Among the choicest quotes is this gem in regard to the claim that Californian's right to vote has been stripped from them by Judge Walker over turning Proposition 8:

The voters of Californians have had no rights stripped from them whatsoever. Our right to vote (did I mention that I live in California?) remains inviolate. In fact, not only has my right to vote not been touched, I still have the right to vote on laws that are not constitutional, such as, say, Proposition 8.

Bishop Jackson would have you believe that all that's necessary for something to become law is that the people vote for it. That we have a Constitution that our laws must measure up to is something he'd like you to forget, as is the fact that the Constitution is designed specifically to protect minorities from the unthinking bigotry of the majority.

If the voters of California voted to re-institute slavery, would Bishop Jackson object if a federal judge (especially an African-American one) struck it down? We still have the right to vote. What we have never had is the right to vote in laws that violate the United States Constitution.

The article is a bit long but worth every moment of reading. What we all need to understand is that the Right's insistence that marriage equality is evil is just plain stupid. No need to flower it up, the bigoted view that same-sex couples do not deserve equality is based in nothing short of hate and ignorance.

Cutest Picture Ever: California Marriages Resumed Edition

(via)

Maybe We Could Marry In Illinois

Recently, we have been considering going to Canada to get married. That's mainly because we don't have any personal vestment or interest in any of the states here in the U.S. that currently recognize marriages between same-sex couples, and because a weekend trip to Canada could be really fun! Besides, after the debacle that is Proposition 8 in California, I'm leery of marrying in any of the states until our federal government gets behind it because we've now seen that all it takes is a few hillbillies with a drive to steal someone's rights away.

Something happened last week though that might change my position. Illinois Senate just introduced a marriage equality bill. Illinois house already has one working it's way through the system, so the Senate starting on one is a good sign. If these go through, Illinois could be the next state to officially recognize civil marriages for all couples. And it just so happens we live in Illinois.

This gives me hope, because I'd love to actually benefit from marriage like the hetero couples we know do. However, the same thing could happen here as did in California, thereby leaving us in limbo. To be fair, the main reason I'm not as concerned about where we get married right now is because it doesn't matter in the eyes of the law: we may be married in Canada, but not in Illinois. In our hearts and minds we'll be married regardless of that, but when it comes to me going to a hospital or demanding benefits for my husband when/if we decide to adopt and one of us chooses to stay home… those things are important. Those things could make me actually consider where we want to get married beyond just how nice it sounds to be married there.

Of course, this is all theoretical right now. Neither bills have passed, and if they do they will need to be reconciled then signed into law by our Governor. Then the inevitable law suits will be filed by wingnut freaks which may or may not delay the law's implementation. All this is not even to mention that we thought they were going to pass this bill last term as part of some funding bill, which they failed to do. What I'm trying to say is that this bill being introduced is a step forward, but not enough of one to give me hope just yet.

To Wed Or Not To Wed

Good As You has a good article up today about the marriage equality in this country and how there are two growing camps within the LGBT community on how to best be civil advocates for marriage rights. Essentially, there is the camp that believes that LGBT couples should take advantage of marriage rights (or something not quite equal and definitely separate) where they can, and the camp that believes LGBT folk should abstain from marriage all together until we can receive full and Federal equal rights.

The marriage activists state that getting married when and where we can allows us as a community to show the world how important marriage is to us and that me marrying my boyfriend is not going to ruin the world. We should take advantage of the rights we are afforded when we are afforded them, and take California's Proposition 8 debacle as a sign of things to come: rights fought for may not always be there. Furthermore, when we do get married, like the couples in California that were able to prior to the hateful bile that is Prop 8, our marriages cause massive legal roadblocks and force people to question the legitimacy of statements like "those who are married can stay that way, but those who aren't already can't get married… and we have no idea what we'll do when it comes to divorce because we don't recognize same-sex couples as legally married… except sometimes."

The abstention group states that to show our opposition to the current state of affairs, and to force heterosexual people that may not even have truly considered the issue, we will not participate in the institution of marriage at all until we have full, Federal equality. We shouldn't marry where legal and we shouldn't participate in marriages. Don't go to your buddy's wedding or your sister's ceremony as a statement. Show the world what they are missing by not allowing us to partake in what should be our legal rights. If we can't get treated equally, than rewarding heterosexual couples for their special treatment doesn't help our cause.

While part of me wants to belong to the more radical thought process of abandoning marriage altogether, I just can't bring myself to that side of the debate. Don't get me wrong, I'm not necessarily against the concept, I just don't think it's the most useful argument for a couple reasons. First, this argument assumes that LGBT couples are actively participating in civil disobedience because they are refusing to marry. That in itself assumes that couples are in a place of the relationship where marriage is the next step. Second, chances are that if you are invited to a wedding, that person likely knows your sexual orientation and (hopefully, if they are your friend) are supportive of you. Punishing that person for not supporting equal rights when they likely do does not seem to be a good thing to do.

If someone is not support of you as an LGBT person, I say go all out on boycotting their wedding. I think it's quite a reasonable question when responding to a wedding invite if the happy-to-be couple supports marriage equality. If they respond in the affirmative, then feel free to join and bring your boyfriend/girlfriend with to the ceremony. However, if they respond negatively, politely letting them know that you can't stand for special treatment in this country is completely appropriate.

I also feel that the strongest statement we can make is to take advantage of our rights when and where we have them, assuming we are in a position to do so. Being able to demand that your work place offer your husband benefits or to introduce your wife as such without a hint or sarcasm is a very strong and powerful statement. It shows our desire as a community to have those rights and our willingness to assume those same responsibilities. It shows that this isn't a fight we are fighting just for shigiggles, but it's a war we are waging for ourselves.

If you don't believe that marriage is right for you and your partner, then I wouldn't presume to pressure you into marriage. I don't believe that we should rush out to marry frivolously. We should honor the concept, and cherish it as well. But I expect the same out of anyone getting married. The key here is that expect equal treatment; equal right to marry and equal responsibility to take that decision seriously. The same as any other couple. That's what we want, at the end of the day, isn't it? To be treated the same?

So while I respect those that had decided to abstain totally from the institution of marriage, I also respectfully disagree. I hope that I can join the ranks of the married some day. And I hope that I have the opportunity to think through the implications completely and to enjoy the benefits, just the same as every one else.

Why Does Illinois Still Fall Behind?

Can someone please explain to me how in the hell Iowa can afford marriage rights to all of it's citizens and now Wisconsin can give LGBT folk a proverbial bone with Domestic Partnership rights, yet Illinois, home of Chicago, bastion of liberalness in the Midwest, remains on the side of bigotry by denying its citizens the right to marriage?

Please, can someone just take five minutes to explain that to me? Because I don't think anyone has a damn clue how inept Illinois politicians can be concerning gay rights. I don't think anyone would have guessed that our "ultra liberal" state could find a way to sweep us queers under the rug and get away with it.

Personally, I'm pretty well focused on why our federal government stills seems to think it's ok to hate on the gays, but that doesn't mean that our states can't work out internal issues in the mean time. With the advances on the federal Proposition 8 challenge coming down the wire today, it seems likely that we'll be hearing more about that sooner rather than later, but again, why can't my damned legislature pass equality measures in this state?

Damned politicians and their utter laziness… I swear, if I did double the amount of work those asshats did in a day, I'd be fired for not getting enough done...

Scalia Is A Fat Guy Who Loves A Weak Military

I, uh… hmmm… How should I say this?

If we can't get the Supreme Court to even listen to a case concerning Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, which is a pretty clear cut and dry discriminatory policy, how in the world do these guys think they can get the Supreme Court to overturn Proposition 8?

Look, I'm all for fighting on every front, and I'm all for letting the rich and privileged fund our fight, and I'm all about pushing and pushing until they give in… but I just don't think the current US Supreme Court will do that for us. I could be wrong, and they could just pop out and surprise us, but I'm not thinking that's going to be the case.

So for now, it looks like we'll just continue to bleed all of our resources out of the military. Don't worry Scalia, those fucking queers you're so willing to toss under the bus won't bother trying to decipher whatever the hell those terrorists are saying anymore. We'll just go have our Pride parade and not worry about being good civil citizens or protecting your fat ass from the evils abroad.

I Can't Wait!!

What sounds fun to legally discriminate against today? Hmmmm… let's see… I know! I don't like Pentecostals. They lie and manipulate their constituents and cause ridiculous amounts of harm to the mind's of the children in their churches, so I'm going to start a voter initiative to outlaw their existence.

What else, what else… Oh, I got it! We should completely ban people who have premarital sex from getting married! Their spreading disease, and what's more, some guy in this class I took told me that his (non-Pentecostal) pastor told him that some guy 2000 years ago said we'd all burn while hanging on splinters for doing it… or something like that. Let's do it!

Or what about those damned women that want to walk around in public in sports bras! That's disgusting! Let's vote on their rights too, because their need for exorcise equipment that keeps them happy and healthy is mildly bothering me in a way that I can't even possibly justify… but think of the children!! How do we explain those scantily clad, healthy ladies to them! Won't somebody think of the Childrens!!

… that all makes about as much sense as the fucking California Supreme Court's decision to uphold Proposition 8 today. I really, really can't wait to start voting on every single minority person's rights, particularly those ones that annoy me or bother me for no other reason than personal, religious, ignorant beliefs, and it'd be even better if what I'm voting on in NO WAY impacts my personal life! It's a joyous day, thanks CA!


…stupid fucks…

Locking Us In Or Locking Us Down?

Everything seems to be pointing to the California Supreme Court's decision on Proposition 8 being handed down tomorrow. Why do I say that? It might have something to do with the adorable barricades being dropped off in the Castro District of San Francisco. Unless they are finally getting around to quarantining all of the 'mos in Castro like Anita Bryant wanted to do back in the day, I'm guessing this looks more like a measure designed to help police when the chaos breaks loose, either positive or negative.

Poignantly, tomorrow also marks the 30 anniversary of the White Night Riots. The riots were in response to Dan White's half-hearted conviction of manslaughter for the murders of Harvey Milk and Mayor Mascone. If you're not familiar, manslaughter is generally used in cases of "accidental" murder… not too accidental when you break into city hall and gun down two victims in two different parts of the building in the head. Needless to say, the LGBT community was none to happy with that ruling, and proceeded to riot through the evening.

Perhaps San Francisco is worried that might happen again? I can tell you this, if the court upholds Prop 8, things won't be sugary and sweet out in the streets.

UPDATE: Looks like this isn't coming down tomorrow after all, but that only leaves next week for the decision. Rumor has it that current mayor and gay rights champion Gavin Newsom asked the court to not hand the decision down on the anniversary of such an important date in gay history.

Be Prepared For The Day Of Decision

I love the Internets. And I also love G.W.B. for giving us the ultra-intelligible pluralization of the Internet. Wait, did I just say I love G.W.B? Wow… those are words I never thought I'd see myself write.

Anyway, I really love the Internets for its amazing ability to allow quick organization and reaction. In the wake of Proposition 8's passage on November 4, we saw a swift and fast reaction, all driven through the magic of the Interwebs. LGBT's (and every other letter, apparently) all across this country of ours rallied within a week, taking over streets, forcing the nation to hear our voices and listen to us for once.

That energy, fueled by righteous anger, has died down, in part because it's fucking cold outside. But we can't let ourselves down now, we still have a lot of work to do. The California Supreme Court heard the verbal challenges to Proposition 8 last week, which was the last step in the legal fight against the measure (in California at least). All we can do now is wait for the Justices to either deem us as equal as they had previously decided, or change their minds and relegate us queers to the sidelines again because a bunch of whiny ass magical ghost lovers had a hissy fit. They have 90 days from the verbal arguments to make an official decision, but the announcement could come any day now.

From the accounts of everyone that watched the proceedings, things do not look particularly rosy for the gays. It appears that yet again we will be forced to prove our validity to life and acceptance. In reaction to… well, rather in preparation for the reaction to the announcement, so of our strongest grass-roots minds have created a new initiative to prepare the LGBT movement for our next step: Day of Decision.

The Day of Decision is a movement to get our community prepared and ready for the Final Word of the Cali Supreme Court. Once their decision is made public, whether it be good or bad, we need to be ready to act and let the nation know how we feel about whatever is decided. Will we be partying or protesting? Honestly, it's hard to tell right now, but we should be prepared for both possibilities, and that is exactly what Day of Decision is about.

Go to the website and sign up to be an organizer. Or stay up to date on planning initiatives by visiting the site regularly. Help the cause and spread the word. We need to be ready to act, because if we fail to react to the decision, we will send the absolute wrong message to the world.

Weight Of The World: What's Running Through My Head

Really Republican's? Limbaugh is your "de facto" leader? That's pretty sad and pathetic, don't you think? I suppose that make sense, given that you elected a similarly pejorative, demeaning ass wipe in to office twice in a row.

Honestly Rihanna? You married Chris Brown? I mean, I didn't realize that you wanted to emulate the life of the trailer trash wife… but OK, sure, if you're into that sort of thing. Ya know, Whitney is a great singer and all, but you probably shouldn't look up to her as a personal idol. Maybe you and Chris can have your own fabulously awful reality show at some point too.

The California Supreme Court is hearing oral arguments today on the fate of Proposition 8. Many experts expect the Court to uphold the prejudicial, vile piece of voter-initiated legislation, but I'm still holding out hope. Someone, at some point, has to be able to point out that taking rights away from a people, regardless of the "will of the voters," is unethical and illegal. This is, after all, all about my right to live happily, not the religious fuck-job's right to be a mindless sheep.

American Mattress is a shitty ass company to do business with. They are charging us $40 dollars plus a tax differential (since tax went up from when we purchased our bed) to replace their busted box springs. Regardless of whether or not that is an industry standard practice, it's a shitty customer service tactic. Furthermore, if your are manager is too much of a puss to call us or to have his number given out, then you no longer deserve our business.

Congress members are starting to make moves toward revoking Don't Ask, Don't Tell via legislation, which is a very, very good thing. Who knows when this will go through, or when it will even be heard, but here's to a better tomorrow in the Service.

Don't Divorce Us

"Fidelity": Don't Divorce... from Courage Campaign on Vimeo.

I watched this video and I cried. 

There is no reason that I should not be allowed to marry when and if I choose to, and there is no reason that any marriages should be invalidated by a bunch of hippocritical, magical book believing fools.

I don't know what else I can say, so I'll let the Courage Campaign say it for me:

Hi,

Have you heard that Ken Starr -- and the Prop 8 Legal Defense Fund -- filed legal briefs defending the constitutionality of Prop 8 and attempting to forcibly divorce 18,000 same-sex couples that were married in California last year? The Supreme Court will hear oral arguments in this case on March 5, 2009, with a decision expected within the next 90 days.

The Courage Campaign has created a video called "Fidelity," with the permission of musician Regina Spektor, that puts a face to those 18,000 couples and all loving, committed couples seeking full equality under the law.

Please watch this heartbreaking video now. If you have the same reaction that I did, you can help spread the word by sharing it with your friends ASAP -- before the Valentine's Day deadline:

http://www.couragecampaign.org/Divorce

The more people who see this video, the more people will understand the pain caused by Prop 8 and Ken Starr's shameful legal proceeding.

After you watch the video, please join me and over 100,000 people who have signed a letter to the state Supreme Court, asking them to invalidate Prop 8 and reject Starr's case.

Thanks.

Instructions: Please Read The Passage Before Trying To Pass A Constitutional Ammendment

The fine folk(s) at G-A-Y have a post up pointing out some interesting information regarding Proposition 8 and the California Supreme Court's decision to institute marriage between same sex couples earlier this year. Here is some of the wording from the Court's ruling:

This passage is leading some to believe that the California Supreme Court may have already formed an opinion on the matter. Considering there are a few cases already in front of this same court asking to overturn Prop 8 or rule it invalid, this may be more important that it first seems.

All indications are that the CA Supreme Court will rule on the issue quickly, possible even by the end of this week.

Margaret Cho At The Cincy Protest

One of my best friends from back in my Cincinnati days, and one of the best Straight Allies this LGBT community has, attended the Marriage Equality Protest in Cincinnati yesterday.  Gay fave Margaret Cho showed up to lend support, as only she can, and decided to sing a little diddy.  Enjoy!

Suck It, Haters!

Today was the big day.  Hundreds of thousands of people took to the streets all over the country to support marriage equality and LGBT rights.  I personally am simply struck with awe with the whole thing.

At our event in Chicago, there were easily 3,000-5,000 people, and I think that's a conservative estimation.  The rally at the federal building was moving and strong and amazing and only met with minimal resistance.  It was the marching that immediately followed that was nothing short of amazing.

At first, Police officers kept us limited to the sidewalks with barricades and mounted officers.  The plan was to march from the rally spot to Millennium Park to make our impact.  The whole way there, we were pushed off to the sidewalk and forced to obey traffic signals, which in my opinion was too symbolic of the gay rights movement to date: complacent, shoved to the side and dismissed.

However, things changed as soon as the police loosened up the leash, which I'm not sure they were planning on.   As a pack, we veered off down Adams and took over the street.  We, as a group, realized that we needed to make a larger statement and needed to been seen and heard, and the only way to do that was to get into the streets and demand attention!

We marched up past City Hall and through Dailey Plaza, then over to State Street (the second of the big shopping strips in downtown), then took to Wacker and over to Michigan Ave to protest on the streets of the Magnificent Mile in front of all the people there.  At one point, I jumped up onto on of the separators in between the traffic directions to get a view of the scene and did not see an end to the horde in either direction, and I swelled up with pride and tears! 

Probably the most poignant part of the whole march came when a straight couple who had literally just been married in the church on Michigan Ave. came out to join the crowd.  They rushed out to the street with the bridal party to take pictures and then took pictures with the mass of us and finally joined us for a block or two.  In itself, it was a symbolic show of support.

People began to break off and head their own way at the end of Michigan Ave. The Police had finally got ahead of the crowd and routed us off the busy streets.  By the time the train weaved around the block back to Michigan Ave., we had lost the steam to control the street and were forced back to the sidewalk, at which point I called it a day and headed home. 

I cannot express how amazing this whole event was.  It literally brought me to tears with the shear power of it all.  And I'm glad to hear that many, many other events went off across the country with similar effect.  Truly, I feel like we have, as one community and one voice, finally begun to push back today.  It's far from the end of the fight, but we have declared in no uncertain terms today that we will fight, and we will not lose or back down.

As an added treat, here is my favorite sign of the day.  In fact, my buddy here received TONS of compliments on it before he let me have it when he broke off and headed home. 

I know many of my friends went out and participated, and I thank you for it.  Did you go?  Tell me about it in the comments or email me your story, I'd love to hear it and share it!

Amazing

Organizers are estimating 10,000-15,000 people were at the PEACEFUL protest last night in NYC (Yes, peaceful. Just because the Crazy Christian organizations want to call it rioting doesn't mean it is rioting). I am absolutely amazed at the turnout and only wish I could have been there.

Check out Joe.My.God.'s write up to get more pictures and to get an insider's perspective on the whole event.

This is the power we need to harness. The voice of thousands, demanding action in unison, cannot be ignored.

Don't forget about this Saturday to get out and DO SOMETHING!

I'm Tired Of Hearing It!

Cincinnati's favorite son George Clooney had some interesting things to say about California's passing of Proposition 8:

"At some point in our lifetime, gay marriage won't be an issue, and everyone who stood against this civil right will look as outdated as George Wallace standing on the school steps keeping James Hood from entering the University of Alabama because he was black."

Hmmm. Well, I have a few opinions here.

First, thank's for the support George. Seriously, we need all the allies we can get, and someone as well known as yourself can truly help to change the minds and hearts of some people out there.

With that said, my second opinion is this is a lotta too late. George, I really appreciate your support, but where were you prior to November 4? A lot of those older voters that adore your mother and respected your father may have listened to what you had to say. An ally with a fan base like yours and a family tree like yours could have seriously helped out.

Third, and this isn't so much George, but everyone really: We need to stop assuming our rights will come to us in time. Wake up everyone! 30 states have stripped LGBT persons of their right to marriage and many others have deemed us unworthy to adopt children by no other consideration than who we love. Every election cycle, more Christian-backed Conservative groups stage marriage initiatives in more states and win. The only eventuality I can see is the complete reduction of my rights as an American simply because I love another man.

If we want marriage equality, if we want to have the same rights as everyone else, if we want to be able to live not as second-class citizens but as rightful Americans, we need to stand up and fight for it. No one sat back and said:

"Ya know, I think those Red Coats will leave eventually, it's just a matter of time. Let's just sit back and have some tea until then"

Or:

"I think us black people will be able to finally fulfill our dreams in this country and have an equal voice at some point, but until then we're just going to keep going to our segregated schools and not try and organize any sort of movement to get our rights. It'll come to us in time, don't you worry."

Those things were never said, because they would be just as untrue about American Independence and African-American Civil Rights as they are about LGBT Equality. We cannot sit idly by hoping someone else will make our dreams come true for us in the future. If we want equality, we need to fight for it, and we need ALL our allies to join us. Don't be content with the potential of hope, realize it.

DO SOMETHING!

Technicalities Are A Bitch

There is a new and fairly interesting argument in the fight against Proposition 8 in California. Remember those lawsuits that were filed right after the Proposition was accepted by voters? It appears that the major argument in the case is now that the Proposition was a Revision and not an Amendment.

Apparently, in California, it is easier to Amend the constitution than it is to Revise it. A simple majority of voters in a general election can approve an Amendment. But a Revision needs approval of 2/3 of the legislature first, then a majority vote in a general election.

The point here is that an Amendment cannot be overly broad, and the argument is that Proposition 8 was more of a Revision to the Equal Protections clause in the State's Constitution than an Amendment in and of itself. Also, if it is a Revision and not an Amendment, then the proper process was not followed in passing the Proposition, thus it is invalid.

It's a long, convoluted trail, but I hope it works. This is basically the same path the lawyers used to argue for the Marriage Equality of same-sex couples in the California Supreme Court. The argument was that LGBT persons are protected under the Equal Protection, thus they must be allowed to marry.

It's very possible we'll see a ruling on this within a week or two, so be prepared. Until then, get prepared for this Saturday's nationwide protest.

Outlaw Divorce, Save The Chil'rens!

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

via www.GoodAsYou.org

We Will Roar, And You Will Be Scorned...

A nationwide protest is taking place this Saturday. All across the country, in at least one location per state, at the exact same time, LGBT-positive people will stand and demand equality. Below is the email I received from Gay Liberation Network, the organization helping to rally the troops here in Chicago:

Next Anti-Prop 8 Protest Set for Chicago

Following Saturday night's successful protest against California Proposition 8 leader James Dobson, when some 500+ came out despite miserable weather, Chicago LGBT activists have set a follow-up protest for 12:30 PM, Saturday, November 15th at the Federal Plaza, corner of Adams and Dearborn Streets, Chicago.

Chicago's protest is part of a nationwide series of simultaneous protests at precisely the same hour on that day -- in over 80 cities and in all 50 states -- coordinated through the website www.jointheimpact.com

Although last Tuesday's vote in California prompted officials in that state to cease issuing marriage licenses to same-sex couples, it's an open question whether the Supreme Court in that state will confirm the ballot referendum or throw it out. Officially, their decision will probably hinge on a legal technicality -- whether or not the referendum language broke a vaguely worded provision of the state constitution that says that referenda cannot be overly-broad in the matters they cover.

However, the real reason for the court's decision will probably have much more to do with the amount of protest heat that LGBT people and our allies can generate outside of the courtrooms. While courts are always loath to admit that public protest influences their decisions, some of the most important progressive decisions have in fact been the direct results of such public protest. A large women's movement in the streets of America made the Nixon-packed, anti-abortion US Supreme Court give us the Roe v. Wade pro choice decision in the 1970s, and during the 1930s, once protests picked up a sufficient head of steam in the middle of the Great Depression, the heretofore conservative court ceased stonewalling President Franklin D. Roosevelt's New Deal programs.

Saturday's nationwide protests are aimed at pressuring the California Supreme Court to reaffirm its earlier pro-gay decision and restore the state's reputation as a beacon for progressives elsewhere. Also on the agenda is bringing full marriage equality here to Illinois -- with one party in overwhelming control of every level of state government, this should not be the impossible task that state Democratic Party leaders often present it as being.

This should be an important gesture of solidarity. Please, let everyone know and get out to your local protest location. You can find more information on where to go here.