Quit It!

I quit smoking three years ago. Stopped cold turkey. Prior to that, I had smoked about 3/4 a pack a day for about five years. One day, I decided that I just didn't want to smoke any longer. Ok, to be honest, that was egged on because of a guy I was dating who was not a fan of my smoky aroma, but after that relationship went sour two months in, I decided to stick with the quitting for my own sake.

It was two years before I even touched another cigarette, and even then only when I was in a highly inebriated state. Since then, I've had the occasional cigarette on a weekend, but nothing extensive. To be honest, probably not the best thing in the world for me to do, but the influence of alcohol and a boosted confidence in "not being addicted anymore" swayed my decisions.

Now, I haven't had a cigarette in over a month, maybe even two. This past week has been absolute hell though, almost as if I'm going through another withdrawal phase, only smaller. I get cravings while I'm at my desk at work and I can't shake them. My immediate reaction is to eat something, but I'm also trying to lose weight, so additional food is not on the plate for me. I'm chewing gum (one of me all time cure-alls… gum chewing helped me lose weight in college and helped when I first quit smoking), but it's not helping. In fact, it's hurting more than it helps. Since I know have a stomach condition that needs to be regulated by massive amounts of Nexium, my doctor has told me to stop chewing gum as it agitates my problem.

All this has left me with my only other tried and true method for overcoming urges: meditation. Meditation is a much slower and time-consuming way to overcome my desire to smoke which makes it non-ideal for the work place. Not to mention this place can be loud and people are constantly walking past my desk…

What's the moral of this story? Don't start smoking. It really fucking sucks. If you are a smoker, quit now but know that it's gonna be hard as hell. The sooner you quit though, the sooner you'll be through the hard times. If you're a smoker that hasn't quit yet and you're around someone who has, be supportive. In general, fuck the tobacco companies and fuck my body's desire for their product.

P.S. - Happy 250th post to me!