It's OK For Me, Not For You

Iowa is the new bastion of progressive thought? Really? Sweet! I like having neighbors that are welcoming and accepting of me… now if I could only get my home state to stop pussyfooting around and approve equal rights….

The gayterwebs (coined it!) are abuzz over the past few days over Obama's lackluster response to the Iowa Supreme Court decision. Before I tear into it dissect it, here's the snippet that has many of us LGBT folk up in arms:

"The President respects the decision of the Iowa Supreme Court, and continues to believe that states should make their own decisions when it comes to the issue of marriage. Although President Obama supports civil unions rather than same-sex marriage, he believes that committed gay and lesbian couples should receive equal rights under the law."

Straight from the horses mouth there kids. Or the horses website, at least.

So he supports "equal rights" at the same time as supporting un-equal and second-class-status-granting Civil Unions? My brain hurts just thinking about this dissonance, I can't imagine what it must be like to actually believe this bull shit! How is it possible to support equal rights at the same time support "separate-but-kinda-not-equal" rights in Civil Unions?

Nurse: I'm sorry sir, only family are allowed to visit right now
Civilly Unioned "Partner": Oh, that's my legally defined partner, although not exactly the same as my Husband, but close enough
Nurse: Wait… so is that you're legal Husband?
CUP: Well, sort of, but not really. Technically, we're suppose to have the same rights as married couples, but someone in the political atmosphere decided that he needed to segregate us further from our peers by not allowing us to be treated equally
Nurse: I'm confused then… are you family or not?
CUP: See, it's a complicated issue…

And on and on and on…. It's an inane difference that will only serve to muddy up the idea of marriage and confuse the public. Yesterday, Jim Douglas, Governor of Vermont, said the reason he vetoed the marriage equality bill passed by the Vermont House and Senate was that he sees no difference between marriage and civil unions. Great! So why arbitrarily separate the two then? If there is really no difference between Marriage and Civil Unions, why should the different terminology exist?

Is it because people like Jim Douglas and Barack Obama see us LGBT folk as different than them? Is it because they do not feel that our relationships are as valid as theirs? Is it because they don't really respect me and my family? The answer, in case you were wondering, is Yes to all the above.

The real litmus test here, kittens, is would Jim Douglas or Barack Obama change their Marriages to Civil Unions? Would they start referring to their wives as legally binded partner? Would they want to have that discussion with a hospital worker who is ignorant of the differences? I doubt it. And if it's not good enough for them, why the fuck should I accept that it's good enough for me?