Are there any people you happen to see every day but don't know at all? And of those people, do you absolutely detest one of them for what you perceive them to be? No? Hmmm… well then, me neither…
OK, well, that's not completely true. There is this one guy that rides the bus with me every morning, but I swear if we ever actually met I'd think he was an utterly miserable tool. I look at him and am amazed that there is anyone out there at all who could think he has anything close to a passably friendly personality. Except maybe his mother, but probably not. I mean, she probably smiles sweetly when he deigns to grace her with his presence and says encouraging things to him on the phone when he calls her to cry himself to sleep every Saturday night while he sits in a watches Golden Girl reruns again, but I can guarantee that she talks to her friends about him like he has Downs Syndrome or just forgets to bring him up in conversation at all.
I simply can't stand him. He gets on the bus every morning wearing whatever "trendy" outfits some fashion magazine picked out for him with his nose turned so far up I'm surprised he doesn’t trip with every step he takes. I know when he gets on the bus too because the distinct aroma of fetid cockiness and disturbed air of unearned confidence travels throughout the bus as everyone lets out a sigh and rolls their eyes. He then proceeds to find an open bench and ensure that his bags find a way to take up the seat next to him, never mind that pregnant grandmother standing up right next to him hanging on to the handrail with frail and wary hands. And heaven forbid someone accidentally brush against his leg which is extended so far into the aisle it may as well be a limbo bar for toddlers because he will instantaneously launch into a tirade of lip smacks, hard stares and mumbling. Oh, and he, of course, needs to open his laptop immediately upon sitting and get on his cell phone and talk and type for the entire trip. Because any person that is actually that important lives in his neighborhood and rides the public transit system out to Rosemont for work on a daily basis…
Why do I hate this guy I've never met? Truthfully, I have no idea. It is completely irrational, and I am completely aware of that, but every time I see him on the bus, which is every work day, I get the urge to scream at him in some guttural language and hope it amounts to a curse that causes his hair to fall out while he weeps in the shower (I may have watched The Craft recently...). Does he have actuall friends and a fruitful, productive life? Who cares! It's much more interesting to project on to him my perception of his life than it is to actually talk to him. Besides, we don't talk to strangers in Chicago, particularly ones who obviously aren't homeless but would likely fit right in if they ever happened to find themselves in that situation.
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